TJ recalls his recent trip to New York and expresses some frustration with his fellow air-traveling humans. New York is a filthy place. The guys discuss Ecstasy on a Plane vs Acid on a Bus. Jon talks about John Wick 3, Booksmart, and Rotten Tomatoes. There is talk of old penises and the best Adam Sandler movie. RIP Tim Conway again, and RIP Leon Redbone. They discuss TV theme songs and this crazy world we live in. They talk about open carry, drones, politics, ocean pollution, teleportation, death, and abortion.
The guys talk about the weather, whiskey, and cat presents. RIP Peter Mayhew and Grumpy Cat. They remember a recently deceased UGA professor. TJ goes night putting. Jon gets brunch, returns to a sushi buffet, and shares an SSG. They discuss Game of Thrones, Athens Business Rocks, Heads or Cocktails, and America. Jon’s mom gets him in a Thai clinch, and they discuss the recent Summer of 99 Reunion.
Talk of diabetes leads to discussion of giving up a foot, which of course leads to toe fungus. This episode has autistic Trump supporters, weird hillbilly accents, and Redneck Isis. The guys offer up theories on the Notre Dame fire and some Avengers Endgame predictions. There is more talk about townies, Joe Biden, Stephen King, and Twilight on mushrooms. And fronking.
The guys kick off the show by sampling Beastmode’s new beer from Akademia Brewing Company, Olen Av Odin, and they find it to be surprisingly delicious. This leads to some toilet talk, black loggers, and the recent songwriter’s retreat. They discuss Heads or Cocktails, the Auburn gymnast, and Leaving Neverland. There is talk of some recent white privilege outside of Little Kings and debate about townie targeting. Rett checks the Urblan Dictionary, and the guys discuss Julian Assange’s recent arrest. Talk of the recent record-breaking python that was captured in Florida leads to a serious discussion about snake-baiting.
The guys gather once again to discuss racism, chair-breaking, and white privilege. They hit some current events with the Jussie Smollet case and the Mueller report. Jon remembers some college tomfoolery, and Rett remembers smoking mad blunts with the dorm housekeeper. The guys talk about lynching, ranch packets, Us, and Captain Marvel. They also discuss Jon’s tone. And, TJ enjoys a delicious Beef n Cheddar.
After some brief technical difficulties, the guys finally get it together enough to produce the quality content that you have come to expect from the Armageddon Afterparty. Rett recounts his river trip, and that leads to a discussion of Baptist sex. The guys talk about Open Toad and debate whether or not the hit podcast Heads or Cocktails could ever be held liable for child support. Jon tweets at the President. TJ talks about dick pics. The guys read some listener mail and revisit teaching your children racism. TJ gives a wrestling update, and they discuss Leaving Neverland. And Rett finally erases all doubt that he is in favor of public breastfeeding.
With Dick Loverboy currently floating down the river, the guys were not able to record an episode this week. But, in its place, you are getting something very special: the most recent episode of Heads or Cocktails, Mr. Loverboy’s other passion project. Listen as Adam, Jack, and Jeremy engage in a battle of wits and of livers at Little Kings in a truly valiant attempt to earn the coveted title of Heads or Cocktails Champion.
The guys come out swinging pretty hard on this one. Apparently, Dr. Seuss is a racist, as is Jesus. The guys debate whether it is okay to be racist with children. Rett gives a Masked Singer update and reveals his secret New Years Resolution. They discuss the Cohen hearing and the 2020 Democratic presidential candidates. There is talk of free will and the multiverse. TJ gives some parenting insight, and the guys talk about getting old. Jon gives a Crawford water quality update. They discuss the Oscars, and the Reverend Florist is tired and mean.
The guys open with the dulcet tones of Terry Bradshaw and close with a lament for the upcoming loss of Michael Jackson’s entire catalog. And in between, they talk about Jussie Smollett, Robert Kraft, Theranos, Brody Stevens, Pen15, Russian Doll, The Sopranos, Heads or Cocktails, gerbils and guinea pigs, the village at the Special Olympics, MAGA hats, top hats, and R. Kelly. Also, Jon wonders whether he is offendable, and TJ makes Jon lose it.
Happy Valentine’s Day, Survivors. Rett has shame. TJ hates Valentine’s Day but apparently loves minefields. Jon gets farted on in Bells again. There is talk of taint massage, Bill Cosby, Mr. Rogers, and Jeff Bezos’ penis. The guys ponder blackface and celebrate National Cheddar Day.
The guys gather for their first show of 2019. Jon and Rett recall the recent Crash Test Dummies show, the guys review some New Years resolutions, and they talk about the recent vegetative pregnancy in the news. They discuss Below Deck, Ted Bundy, and the Fyre Festival documentaries. Rett shares a nude pic, Jon shares some Werner Herzog, and they take a trip to Murder Mountain.
The guys gather for their final show of 2018, debate this year’s best guest, and get one last Stephen King update from Rett. They talk about boogers and poots, dogs, and the dynamics of a good dick slap. They remember Penny Marshall, poorly, and talk about the Crash Test Dummies, New Year’s Eve plans, and almost pooping oneself. They listen to the “Let Me Be Frank” video, remember the greatness of the recent Basketball Team show, and talk about trashbags full of whippits. Rett shares some Crunk House stories, and they guys look onward toward 2019.
Dick Loverboy, Rev Flo, and Lil Skweeque return for a very special Christmas episode. Jon plugs the upcoming Basketball Team show on December 22. The guys revisit the SEC Championship and discuss whether Baby Skweeque is going to be lied to about Santa Claus. They share fond memories of Christmas morning and He-Man. The Great Poo Controversy rages on as Jon continues to try to defend his honor. They discuss “Baby, It’s Cold Outside”, Breaking Bad, and Saturday morning cartoons. There is talk of underwear and the fact that an inordinate number of disgusting sexual maneuvers are inextricably and proudly linked to the great state of Ohio.
TJ is sick. Jon has dry skin. The guys make SEC Championship predictions and talk about wombat feces. They discuss The Last Jedi, UHF, Strange Brew, Logan’s Run, and Kathy Bates’ bush. They debate the merits of rail-gunning trash into the sun and come up with a new Burger King slogan. And TJ gets a new nickname.
The guys gather once more to talk about 7-11 socks, Thanksgiving plans, and memories of Opryland. They have another timely discussion of the Georgia gubernatorial race and some UGA football. Rett finally reveals his platform and talks about campers and portable toilets. They discuss Homecoming, Breaking Bad, and the Bum Bag. And somewhere, a deaf kid farts…loudly.
Ah, remember those magical days between Halloween and Election Day? Well, that is when this episode was recorded. The guys talk about Rett’s new work dog, Pete’s Dragon, and Gene Kelly’s butt. They revisit Vaginas vs Buttholes. There is discussion of Owen’s recent Behind the Dial comedy show at Wayward. Jon attacks Republicans, Rett attacks feminists, and TJ speaks for all women. They discuss whether the lips match the nips, and they debate whether one can have too many coozies.
Rett drinks brown liquor, gives an Alchemy update, and tells the story of the best ground score ever. TJ hates thieves, and apparently, Jon sometimes. TJ and Jon offer a UFC 229 recap. Rett’s wife can’t vote, so the guys discuss some politics and voter suppression. Rett gives a Wild Rumpus update and then talks some Stephen King. And finally, the guys discuss whether or not Georgia Republican gubernatorial candidate Brian Kemp steals Mexican kidneys.
The guys finally make their triumphant return to the original Bunker and find it to be both newly-renovated and extremely chill. There is talk of The New Day, soggy waffles, and yard shoes. They recap UGA football and talk about Referee James Carter, and they discuss the recent Primus show. Rett gets ready for the Alchemy burn, and Jon laments the loss of pimiento cheese Krystals. Then the guys sit back, get relaxed, and talk about their happy places. Bill Cosby is going to jail. Rett reveals his Star Crunch knowledge. TJ talks about belly buttons and buttholes.
The guys welcome Henry Mitchell III back to The Bunker once again for what may be record-breaking episode. They spend some time discussing Loverboy for Sheriff 2020, and Henry announces his intention to run for Mayor of Athens in 2024 and President sometime after that. The guys debate UGA vs Ohio State, get a Stephen King update, and talk about some movies, including an unusual take on Star Wars from Rett. They argue about the best Mario Kart characters and discuss whether Donald Trump is the President that America deserves right now. Henry tells tales of racism. Rett educates Henry on Ketamine. They talk about bicycle speed records, bike lanes, the African American hair situation, and Paul Flart. Then, the Browns actually win a football game, and that kicks off a discussion of quite possibly one of the most unusual bets ever devised.
TJ reveals some unusual information about his infant daughter. The guys come up with a Beef n Cheddar / Adult Diaper Challenge. Jon runs on fumes and offers raccoon mystery updates. Rett updates on his stay-cation and offers input on turf grass management. The guys talk about Hurricane Florence and pig shit lagoons. Jon talks about the ACC PD town hall meeting and drops some breaking news. Rett announces his candidacy for Sheriff. The guys talk about buffets, debate Jesus Christ or Michael Jordan, and discuss the recent Serena Williams incident. Rett and TJ both share stories of being ejected from intramural sports. And TJ talks about college.