God, it has been a while. The guys gather in their new second bunker for all of that nonsense that you have come to know and love. Rett laments the loss of Justice Anthony Kennedy, and the guys discuss lip tattoos, meteor mining, and cupcakes for gay people. They talk about the Space Force and wonder if John Glenn is dead. They mourn the loss of Anthony Bourdain, and debut a new segment called Big Talk with Pigroast. Rett shares his recent magazine articles and gives his review of The Elephant Man. Jon signs up for an open mic. Rett admits to putting his own penis in his mouth, and the guys wonder if gay is funnier when it is between dudes.
Jon offers a Beef n Cheddar update, drinks delicious Flaming Lips beer, and talks about a man that he knows. Rett heeds the call of the river. There is discussion of the Georgia gubernatorial race, Black Pete, and the Tim Horton's shitter. The guys discuss public bidets. Jon talks about sandwiches. TJ has to go take care of a sick child, so Rett and Jon press on without him, talking about the new Georgia phone law, Childish Gambino, meatloaf, Cafe Racer, and the prowess of feta.
Jon eats a Beef n Cheddar, which leads to discussion of the new Predator movie, Bill and Ted 3, Solo, Atlanta, Beetlejuice 2, and the studio politics of Empire Strikes Back. The guys swap piece-of-shit car stories and have a brief discussion about TrumpAmerica. They talk about their friend Jeremiah's wedding and somehow end up in an uncomfortable conversation about sexual assault. They respond to some listener mail. Rett lays out some four-year goals for himself, and they discuss how pretty his mother is. Jon questions the existence of god. TJ hates fat babies. Rett talks about what puberty was like for him, and the guys wish everyone a happy Mutha's Day.
Have you ever been to Helen, Georgia? Well these guys have, and they are going to talk about it. They also give their opinions on water parks, the state of Florida, and Whitewater (TJ hates it). Rett comes up with his 19th million dollar idea. Jon offers corrections and apologies. They discuss Alex Mack and NXIVM, Ponzi schemes vs pyramid schemes vs multi-level marketing, and the magic of sauna. TJ has been watching a lot of prison shows. Rett checks his Christian privilege, and the guys debate, once again, whether they should start their own cult.
The guys talk about Kriss Kross, buttholes, and the movie Tremors. TJ and Jon talk about the recent Judah Friedlander show at the 40 Watt. Rett talks about the Greenway. There is talk of Andre the Giant, and they discuss the finer points of going out dick in hand. Jon brings up world ejaculation records. Rett takes part in a crowd work challenge. Jon loses the ability to do math. TJ loves wings. They debate oil money vs. train money. And then things just fall apart at the end. But you should definitely stay tuned for the post-credits scene.
So the long awaited discussion of Bruno Mars's possible cultural appropriation just doesn't happen. Instead, the guys talk about The X-files, Legion, darts, Strange Brew, and a recent outing to Open Toad. TJ tells tales of his friends jerking off dogs. Jon tells an unusual poop story. Rett recounts the river trip. They discuss the YouTube shooter, media bias, and baby sheep. And they end up talking about The Shocker, diarrhea, and the G-Day Game.
The guys come together once again to discuss Rett's weird-ass dogs, some television shows and movies, and how much Rett hates Siri. Jon tells a dog-kicking story. The guys bid a fond farewell to Stephen Hawking and to Richard Jewell. Rett gives a Dark Tower update. Jon talks about seeing a chihuahua recently with a truly massive penis. They discuss climate change and the logistics of Maximum Overdrive. And, they wonder once again, is Jon racist?
The guys come together once again and quickly realize that they have actually been bawling out of control. Discussion of college basketball leads to talk of the opioid crisis. They revel in their memories of the recent Flaming Lips show and mourn the loss of Rett's amazing mustache. TJ reaffirms that he hates rave pants and Jimmy Buffett. A recent bathroom discovery leads to a discussion of proper pooping etiquette. They talk about the Oscars, Ryan Seacrest, and the good old days of "pretty much" consent. There is talk of President Trump and wondering whether one can absorb nitrous oxide anally.
Jon steps out for a minute. Rett opines about millennials. The guys discuss the logistics of Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome. Jon recommends Black Panther. Rett hates memes. TJ can't go to prison. They play Would You Rather? and discuss Cobra Kai. Rett has doggy issues, and they end things by talking about guns, Golden Panda, and Lexington food options in general.
The guys kick things off with some talk about the recent school shooting in Florida. They also discuss the Winter Olympics, moonshine, and some really weird eating habits. They debate whether one can receive a cold virus from performing oral sex. They talk about the hit new movie The Ritual, now available on Netflix. This episode is proudly brought to you by Cockwrench Liquor.
First of all, one of Rett's stupid dogs crapped in The Bunker, like a jerk. Also, some mystery person snuck in and crapped at Jon's job. The guys discuss murdering child molesters, curling, and the Super Bowl. They talk about all of those maniacs in Philly. Rett goes bowling. They discuss the recent Tide Pod Challenge, and Rett talks about sucking batteries as a child. TJ talks about his beautiful baby, and the guys discuss Solo, the Terminator franchise, and the X-Files. Jon gives his report from a recent open mic, and Rett workshops material.
The guys come together once more to talk about zero gravity raves, the TV edit of Silence of the Lambs, and the upcoming Flaming Lips concert. TJ comes up with a new motto, and the guys discuss sharing Christ with Siri. Rett tells some jokes. Jon offers a riddle. Our friend Jeremiah murdered his sister. A discussion of Whole 30 transforms into a discussion of anilingus. Talk about AirPods turns into talk about Air Bud. The guys discuss the government shutdown, greased lightpoles in Philly, and The Big Unit. And, they ponder whether or not Jon is, in fact, a bitch.
After a bit of a hiatus, the guys finally get back together in The Bunker to welcome 2018, talk about Georgia football, and apologize for things that Rett says. The guys talk about Down Syndrome, space telescopes, edging, the Me Too Movement, dick punching, Mexican food, and of course, The Dark Tower. Jon throws out some Asian accents. They spend a little time on President Trump's shithole countries comment and offer poorly informed opinions on tax breaks. There is talk of Black Mirror and The Room. They discuss the legality of the Buffalo Bill move, TJ offers up his orgasm noise, and Rett describes his genitals. And they wrap things up with a rousing game of Guess the Omelette.
The guys welcome another guest to The Bunker for this episode, their good friend Adam, and there is discussion of Christmas parades, Christmas concerts, old-time country radio, and Leonardo Dicaprio's penis. They debate the best and worst Zelda games and spend some time discussing University of Georgia football. They review this week in sexual harassment accusations, and Jon attempts to injure Rett's dog live on-air. AND, Adam plugs the upcoming Christmas concert of his band Basketball Team on December 23 at the Foundry in beautiful Athens, Georgia.
The guys welcome their second female guest ever to the Bunker, the lovely Allison of the Calla. They talk sweet potatoes, refrigeration, dick-grabbing, and delicious Bell's lasagna. Allison offers a different perspective on the ongoing wave of sexual harassment allegations, and they discuss exactly what a creep Matt Lauer really is. There is talk of gender bias in language and double standards. The guys ponder whether or not they have ever sexually harassed any other guys, and boy have they. They talk about video games, the 3rd Amendment, and the Athens Anti-Discrimination Movement, and they end the episode with some Ric Flair sex math.
Rett tells a tale of throwing things he loves out windows, which leads to a lengthy discussion of the best orifices in which to hide contraband. The guys swap concussion stories and talk about CTE. There is talk of masturbation technique and pickleball. They discuss UGA football and the BCS tournament. Rett remembers Mousercising, and they wonder if Apache Chief is going to be in the new Justice League movie.
The guys talk about Rett's recent obsession with The Dark Tower, the Menendez brothers, gray pubes, and buttholes. They make fun of Jon's giant head and disgusting fat body. There is an election update and some discussion of the dynamics of a church shooting. They talk about the recent flood of sexual abuse allegations, and Rett talks about Triangle Biscuit and female orgasm tents. There is a UFC 217 recap, talk of white privilege, and drunken tales of cats in distress.
The boys are back together once again. They talk about the name Tim, lunchtime pornography, and the proper spelling of bukkaki. Rett defends Harvey Weinstein. They discuss the best and worst times in American history as well as social media and its effects on relationships. There is talk of Mindhunter, Riverworld, and the tv edit of Silence of the Lambs. They discuss the upcoming UFC 217 and the fact that UGA football is number one in the nation. And, they honor their second female listener.
In the absence of TJ, Rett and Jon get together and press on without him. There is more talk of the National Anthem Protests. There is also talk of the recent Las Vegas attack and the Second Amendment. They discuss Jon's tactics for dealing with crazies, Tubular Bells, and Perfect Strangers. Jon tries to tell an emergency poo story, but is almost immediately upended by Rett's much better and more interesting saved-an-old-woman-from-choking-at-Taco's story. They issue some RIPs, discuss the fact that the Juice is Loose, and talk about whether TJ really thinks Jon hates him.
In the absence of Jon, Rett and TJ get together to press on without him. There is talk of the National Anthem Protest, Dipping Dots, squirting, and general squirting etiquette. Rett recalls his days as a door-to-door salesman. TJ shits on Helen, Georgia, and they both shit on Trump. They discuss Bladerunner 2049. Rett expresses his fear of a truly awful pun. They talk about owl sex, dolphin penises, and Georgia trivia.